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LostKitten · Senior Member

Merit/Demerit Rewarding System

kattrainer · Veteran Member

There might be merit wink

in that kind of system, but it tends to take the spontenaiety (sp?) out of the relationship. Too business like for me, although I might keep track of spanks earned (In fact I do keep track of spanks earned). The problem with that, of course, is that spanks aren't always viewed as punishment by the spankee. Actually, in my experience, almost never. But what hey, shouldn't everybody get in on the fun of a nice pink bottom?

So, I believe in a response to naughtiness. Especially intentional, get-my-attention naughtiness. Not just-broke-the-vase-having-fun" naughtiness.

You know what works? A squirt gun. Kitties hate squirt guns.

Plus, we all know that kittens have a very short attention span and deferred punishment will seem disconnected with her original naughtiness... You get that "What did I just do?" look when you get around to adding up the demerits.

Master Tallone · Member

I agree with kattrainer. I like the spontenaity of reward or punishment. If Master is attentive to kitten enough He will know when the time is right to surprise kitten with a reward. It makes kitten feel special that Master does notice what kitten may think is not noticed.

Conversely, the punishment is difficult because many kittens either like the usual punishments or are with Master because He is not the pain type of person. I find withholding what kitten likes to be sufficient. If she likes to play with yarn....no yarn. If she likes to play with a ball...no ball. Once kitten realizes her actions will not allow her to play with what makes her happy, kitten usually will be the good kitten her Master knows in His heart she is.

LostKitten · Senior Member

*giggles* Oh those are great answers. Thanks very much for the insight. Toys being taken away would indeed teach kitten. And yes, sometimes kitten does like a nice pink bottom.

Sui Juris Cattus · Guru

I don't tend to use the merit system myself, for previously mentioned reasons.

However, let's say there was some big deal coming to town that kitty wants to attend. At that point a form of merit system would be involved. If kitty misbehaves, a warning is given to say that their special day is in jepordy. Obviously, extra-good behaviour is rewarded by taking away warnings.

Now one merit system I have thought of using more often goes like this. You light a candle at the beginning of play-time and extingiushed at the end...unless there is some willfull disobedience, then its gets blown out immediately and cannot be relit for 24 hours. When the good behaviour candle finally burns all the way down, kitty gets to choose an outing.

kattrainer · Veteran Member

Should add one more thought to all this. When girls are just starting their evolution into kitties (especially when not just light kitten play, but building toward being a kitty in a regular Master/pet relationship or even a 24/7 pet) rewards are much more important than punishment.

Kitties need to feel comfortable in their new "skin" and anything that breaks their sense of their new kitten-selves and their comfort and happiness is likely to intrude.

When cat/girls learn to readily fall into and stay in their "kitty-space" then punishment can be applied in the context of their life as a kitty. But rewards really work best with kitties, I think.

What fun.

Anabelle · Senior Member

As far as general "training" goes for real animals, the newer, and now commonly used practices usually lean toward rewards instead of punishments. Like, in training a real puppy, you don't just yell at the dog for soiling the carpet, you take them outside and when they do it right you praise them.

I think this method probably works best in serious training; however, in the BDSM niche, especially if its just for play, I think whatever people like to do works well, especially when many "punishments" are actually pleasurable.

LostKitten · Senior Member

Sui Juris Cattus wrote:
However, let's say there was some big deal coming to town that kitty wants to attend. At that point a form of merit system would be involved. If kitty misbehaves, a warning is given to say that their special day is in jepordy. Obviously, extra-good behaviour is rewarded by taking away warnings.

Oh but Sui, are you saying that because you happen to know there's an event coming up that kitten is interested in attending ???

LostKitten · Senior Member

kattrainer wrote:
When girls are just starting their evolution into kitties (especially when not just light kitten play, but building toward being a kitty in a regular Master/pet relationship or even a 24/7 pet) rewards are much more important than punishment.
Kitties need to feel comfortable in their new "skin" and anything that breaks their sense of their new kitten-selves and their comfort and happiness is likely to intrude.

When cat/girls learn to readily fall into and stay in their "kitty-space" then punishment can be applied in the context of their life as a kitty. But rewards really work best with kitties, I think.

Thanks again for the insight. Very good advice.

janet · Senior Member

Oh, I'm getting so inspired by the candle idea! In ways that have nothing to do with dripping wax, I mean, just using it as a very visible, pretty timer.

And to reply to the original question, my ex and I used to jokingly use a "star chart" (like you might have had in kindergarten) to track good behavior but it wasn't taken seriously. I'm vaguely remembering one time when I did or said something awesome (though I forget what) and I got something like "a million billion stars," if that's any indication of how serious it was.

Saberrah · Senior Member

I grew up with the merit point system and I absolutely hated it! If Sir was to incorporate that system again into my life, this kitty will surely rebel and then die.

I much prefer the immediate action. If kitty is good, she's praised, if she's naughty, she's praised. *Blinks innocently*

janet · Senior Member

*reads that sentence very carefully, using her claw to follow along the words* If...kitty is good...she's praised...Ok. If she's naughty, she's...praised...

I...there's...an issue there somewhere, but I can't seem to find what it is. Huh. Well, never mind. :D

LostKitten · Senior Member

I'm a bit of a clumsy kitten. I'd knock the candle over and set the house on fire. The ensuing marshmallow roast would be fun tho.

A million billion stars sounds perfectly reasonable to me. *nudges janet and hands her a piece of nice warm baked bread*

A star award system would be fun if Master attached the stars directly on to kitten.

Lai · Veteran Member

The kitties would sure look cute with pretty glittery stars on their faces ^3^
Star on the nose, star on the ears, star on the cheeks, star on the whiskers, etc
Now I want pretty glittery starry stickers >.< *whines and goes to find Papa*

Sui Juris Cattus · Guru

LostKitten wrote:

Sui Juris Cattus wrote:
However, let's say there was some big deal coming to town that kitty wants to attend. At that point a form of merit system would be involved. If kitty misbehaves, a warning is given to say that their special day is in jepordy. Obviously, extra-good behaviour is rewarded by taking away warnings.

Oh but Sui, are you saying that because you happen to know there's an event coming up that kitten is interested in attending ???

I am. (At least when I had a kitty) Either she'd tell me it was something she wanted to attend, or because I just knew she was into it.

*sticks stars on Janet's, LostKitten's and Lai's noses*

-- Edited by Sui Juris Cattus on Wednesday 1st of July 2009 03:41:36 AM

-- Edited by Sui Juris Cattus on Wednesday 1st of July 2009 03:41:58 AM

Saberrah · Senior Member

*Looks at Janet in confusion* What? I think it makes purrfect sense!

-- Edited by Saberrah on Wednesday 1st of July 2009 04:20:20 AM

TorbjornS · Veteran Member

I hawe tested a system like that but I think is quit hard to keep it up in the long term to so mutch anther things in life are in the way.

LostKitten · Senior Member

Goodness but us kittens sure do run amok quickly. *starts stuffing dancing kittens into big cardboard box*

Come on kittens, Masters have important Master stuff to discuss.

Masters don't need a litter of crazy kittens, covered in shiny stars, twirling and dancing all around them.

(Or do they?)

Sui Juris Cattus · Guru

LostKitten wrote:

Goodness but us kittens sure do run amok quickly. *starts stuffing dancing kittens into big cardboard box*

Come on kittens, Masters have important Master stuff to discuss.

Masters don't need a litter of crazy kittens, covered in shiny stars, twirling and dancing all around them.

(Or do they?)

*Watches the kitties running amok and snickers*
Um...yes, yes we do need that. *puts a star on each of LostKitten's ears*

Now, DANCE!!! *giggles*

kattrainer · Veteran Member

Sui Juris Cattus wrote:

LostKitten wrote:

Goodness but us kittens sure do run amok quickly. *starts stuffing dancing kittens into big cardboard box*

Come on kittens, Masters have important Master stuff to discuss.

Masters don't need a litter of crazy kittens, covered in shiny stars, twirling and dancing all around them.

(Or do they?)

*Watches the kitties running amok and snickers*
Um...yes, yes we do need that. *puts a star on each of LostKitten's ears*

Now, DANCE!!! *giggles*

Yes, Lost one, that is EXACTLY the point of having kitties around.

You all get the reward of your choice...a pink bottom? ;)

LostKitten · Senior Member

Masters are so easily distracted. Opps did I say that out loud.

Sui Juris Cattus · Guru

Unfortunately for you, you did.

I'll let you decide, paddle or cane?

PinkTeacup · Veteran Member

Paddle paddle paddle!

...>.>

....<.<

I was never here.

-- Edited by PinkTeacup on Thursday 2nd of July 2009 01:20:58 AM

janet · Senior Member

Hmm. The kitten in me wants to stay in the box (A BOX! OH MY GOD. BOX BOX BOX) but the human in me wants to be near the paddle! *tries to climb through all the other kitties in the box with the goal of ending nose-side in the box, tail-side out*

LostKitten · Senior Member

Sui Juris Cattus wrote:
Unfortunately for you, you did.
I'll let you decide, paddle or cane?

Isn't the 'This or That' game taking place in the Crazy kittens group?

Sui Juris Cattus · Guru

Not exactly.
You were naughty :p

LostKitten · Senior Member

Oh, Sui. I'm ALWAYS naughty. But if I'm to decide then I'll say .....

flogger or Master's hand *grins sheepishly*