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kitten130 · Veteran Member

Age Difference

kisa · Senior Member

Just a number. As long as it's legal (aka, not a minor) i see no problem with any age difference. My Master is 19 but sometimes acts and sounds like he's 40 and i love him for it :) But then again, i've had to end a relationship because he was 20 but acted like he was a horny 15 year old, and nothing else. If i didn't have my Master, i would probably lean towards someone older because the maturity is nice... and the experience wouldn't be bad either *laughs*

Bestia Vinco · Senior Member

I use to search for younger (21-25) subs because I felt that younger girls were more submissive then older. Then I met my last pet (a kitten) when she was 38 and she was the most naturally submissive person I've ever known. So I don't think age matters at all as long as you find in each other the characteristics that make you each feel complete.

Faete · Senior Member

Age isn't a big deal to me at all.

Right now, I am 23, and Master is 37. When we started dating, I was 18, and we've been together a bit over 5 years now.

I think the thing that is MOST important is how well you two mesh. I've dated people my age, but Master was the first person I have ever dated who is significantly older than me.

Actually, I guess it's funny how that worked out, especially since I wasn't LOOKING for a man his age. But, I am also a believer in fate. ;)

Oh, wow. Guess I am starting to ramble. To sum it up: If you two get along, and are legal, I don't see why not. :)

kitten130 · Veteran Member

Well, I'm a 21 yr old sub but I do have my spaz moments....could be the brat in me though.

Im just at a point these days where I just want to settle down...I still want to have my fun but I mean everyone needs to have fun once in a while right? Strange thing, I have absolutely no desire to go to college and rather not spend all that money trying to figure out what I want in life. What I desire more than anything is just a family and a good steady home life. I dont have to make big money or anything...I understand I have to work but I mean heck life isnt peachy all the time.

I've been told myself that I'm mature for my age and I guess I can kind of attest, such as when girls I was friends with from HS my age are still wrapped up in petty boy troubles and stuff and I'm like, uh, so she looked at your boyfriend, get over it.

Faete · Senior Member

kitten130 wrote:

Im just at a point these days where I just want to settle down...I still want to have my fun but I mean everyone needs to have fun once in a while right? Strange thing, I have absolutely no desire to go to college and rather not spend all that money trying to figure out what I want in life. What I desire more than anything is just a family and a good steady home life. I dont have to make big money or anything...I understand I have to work but I mean heck life isnt peachy all the time.

Yeah, I can understand that. I think a lot of people can. Actually, we are a lot alike. :) I am not a big party animal myself, and my biggest desire right now is a steady and happy home life. I wasn't interested in going to college until recently, after some events happened in my life to make me want a very specific career.. But it's not for everyone, and I know a lot of people are of the opinion that it is. *shakes head*.

Wishing you best of luck! :)

Mynx · Senior Member

I don't see what the big deal is with some people and age differences. While I myself am not in a relationship with an obvious age gap, my best friend is. I'm a strong believer in a relationship working through the way the two people's personalities work together. So age is just a number to me.

Tygra · Senior Member

Master is younger by a few years but far more experienced and wiser than I.
Heck, my mom is 8yrs older than my dad.
So no, I don't really think age is an issue.

MissAbsinthe · Senior Member

Well, is an issue quite close to my heart, I am in my late teens, and my Master is like, 36? there is Nearly a 20 year age gap between us!
But, despite all this, it has never really affected us, we are very much in love, and I enjoy being in his service more than I can describe.
To be honest now I hardly notice the age gap now, although other people around us often act as a reminder ;p
I think age is often not an issue created by ourselves or our love, but by the opinions of the others, those of which we know and don't know.
Luckily these things "Social taboo" tend to wear off, the second I'm in my 20s, it wont be a big deal to anyone.

-- Edited by MissAbsinthe at 21:21, 2008-07-15

Kitten · Senior Member

i dont think age is that big a deal, if the couple are in love and want to be together then let them, its there lives and there decisions. Master and i are only a couple of months difference in age so its never been a problem for us.

Miss A i thought you we're older than what you are from seeing your videos - maybe like 23/24, but your actualy the same age as me =^_^=

MasterMorhion · Veteran Member

Tygra wrote:

Master is younger by a few years but far more experienced and wiser than I.
Heck, my mom is 8yrs older than my dad.
So no, I don't really think age is an issue.

Aye, like my kitten said, she is a few years older then me, as I am about to just turn 25. I have to agree with what everyone has said, age to me, is simply a number. Many 'men' who are suppose to be far more wiser and mature then me, tend to be nothing more then boys. While I have met 'boys' who have proven to be the most experienced and level-headed Men I've come across.

Age is simply a number(as long as it is legal), the mindset of the person is what's imporant. While my kitten may be older, she acts like she is much younger, and while I may be younger, my mind, soul, and heart are a great, great deal older, I always say I'm a old man (38-42) trapped in a young man's body lol. But at times it can balance either way, as long as the love is there, the commitment and each is devoted to the other, then age is simply a guide, nothing more.

Faete · Senior Member

MissAbsinthe wrote:

Luckily these things "Social taboo" tend to wear off, the second I'm in my 20s, it wont be a big deal to anyone.

Hmm, I don't know if that is true. There's a 14 year age gap between my master and me - I am in my 20s, and we still hear comments from others. It will be less of a big deal, but it probably won't just go away.

kitten130 · Veteran Member

I can say honestly I've always gone for older guys...its a very very rare thing that I would be truly interested in a guy thats younger than me.

Its funny because I used to be wary of age differences..at least when I was in my late teens.

Then it happened and suddenly...I just dont care anymore. I'm not infatuated to the point that I'm out of my head, I know he has flaws and somehow that just makes it better.

I'm about sick of taboo anyway...I mean heck, I much prefer the road less taken. I love living life the way I want and not having to conform to someone else's beliefs or opinions. Had I lived the way others wanted me to, and I did barely a year ago..I would be all about religious and pretty much abandon all of my fantasies and thrills. I mean come on, I love being a kitten, and I love being a toy...I love BDSM and kinky sex too much to shun it LOL

Allright I got off subject...LOL

Sterling · Member

I tend to go for younger kitties - not really because of appearences, but because I like the young-at-heart nature. If I found that in someone older I would be all for that too, age really is just a number. Plus, I want someone who is not set in their ways - I want to feel like the person doing the teaching, taking care of that other person, and not vice versa.

<shrugs> Call me a dirty old man if you want, but my last long term relationship was a 10 year difference... I met her when she was 18 and 3 months. :P

LaLa · Veteran Member

n_n It's good to know that I am not the only kitten here who bears a considerable age gap, between herself and her master.
I am 19 and my master is 36.
I've found that I naturally have this...incredible attraction to older gentlemen. I am not sure why that is, but a lot of the women in my family say it is because I never had a father-figure, growing up. (They have a point, but...I doubt that's the reason. *wink, nudge*)
I have tried dating younger men in past (ergo: men closer to my own age) but just like kitten130 said, the young ones tend to have a one-track mind. ^^; ...Unfortunately. (Not saying that all young men out there are like that, however...it seems to be a common 'problem') Also, we all know that not ALL boys mature as quickly as girls do...hence the reason why I find myself dangerously attracted to the older gents.

But pushing all that to the side, age is only a number for me. I care more about what lies within a person's heart, soul and mind...rather than the numerical figures which man has placed atop their heads....and used as a validation of maturity. (D: tsk tsk) <-Note: This may seem like a slight contradiction as to what I said earlier about my attraction to older men...but it really isn't. If by chance I happen to stumble upon a young man with what I call "an old soul" ;) then I may make the odd acception and take an interest in him. (:3 young men like that, usually pique my curiosity. tee hee..)

....
I think I'll stop rambling for now!

-- Edited by LaLa at 09:30, 2008-07-18

squeak · Member

I'm 22 and i met my boyfriend when i was 18 and he was 32, we'er still together now and Miss Absinthe is right as soon as i hit 20 people didnt seem to mind as much. some of my friends think its weird but then they think the fact that i like being a kitten is weird too :P lol
i supose you cant help who you fall in love with *sigh*

DaddysTouch · Veteran Member

Being a 19 year old top, like myself, is not easy! Most girls my age are looking for older guys, and I'm not interested in anyone significantly older than me (mid to late 20s would be the upper limit).

The younger you go, the fewer girls there are it seems. There's a descent number of 19 year olds, but very few 18 year olds and of course 17 and 16 year olds (though of legal age in the UK) do not officially exist on the personals sites or at most munches (which specify 18+). Even if I could find one, I'd be skeptical of the maturity of someone that age. Not that I think it's impossible, looking back to when I was 17, I'm fair sure I was sufficiently mature to top competently, but I suspect that's rare.

There's plenty of 20-22 year olds which is fine with me, but who under 30 wants a dom younger than them? :(

There's also the issue that many people in my age (myself included) have university which makes things difficult. There's quite a few girls out there who are 'not looking right now' because of uni. I mean, it's pretty awkward to explain what all those banging sounds and muffled screams where the next morning, or to hide your play equipment when people are coming in and out of your room all the time, or even to find time to have a serious relationship with anyone not on campus (no parking at most universities, so no cars).

-- Edited by DaddysTouch at 13:31, 2008-07-27

imissmanny · Senior Member

Tim's only 3 years older than me, but I've always dated older guys... Not on purpose, they attract to me I guess? I have a very young personality and I look younger than I am so it doesn't make much sense to me.... But yeah, Tim is ages older than me at heart and I love it that way... He takes care of me and teaches me things... The only thing he's not experienced with is sex lol and I'm used to doing the teaching there.... But yeah this kitty play is new to both of us so it's going to be one awesome adventure :D

DaddysTouch · Veteran Member

I definitely identify with the 'older at heart' thing. A work colleague tried to guess my age the other day - guessed I was 26 lol.

imissmanny · Senior Member

You look older, but not in a bad way :3 Like the whole looks old but not tooooo old :P

Kitten · Senior Member

DaddysTouch wrote:

I definitely identify with the 'older at heart' thing. A work colleague tried to guess my age the other day - guessed I was 26 lol.

i thought you were older to until you said you where the same age as me :P

silversnowleopardess · Senior Member

Master and I have a considerable age gap, but the other way. He's 24 and I'm 41. He says he was drawn to my maturity (when needed) and the way I act younger than I truly am. And he's pretty mature for his age.
We used to get a lot of comments about it from other people, but that has died down somewhat. But yeah, to echo everyone else; so long as you are both legal, age is nothing but a number.

kitten lover · Veteran Member

age doesnt matter to me ive had older kittens befor but never younger ones being im 16 but who cares how old the person as long as the love is there

DarkNeko · Veteran Member

With my kitten its within a 5 year difference currently. I don't normally date anyone that is beyond 5 years. I did once and it ended horribly, too much miscommunication.

andrew77uk · Veteran Member

Age is just a number like previously stated. But also think about your social circles. No one should ever neglect your friends, and sometimes they can be equally influential in such matters

faery · Veteran Member

Gonna kick this topic for a bit, if no-one minds.

I'm 23, my current partner is 30. In the past few years I -always- dated guys much older than me (between 29 and 38 years old). Not that I was specifically looking for guys that age, it just happened. Although I must add I was really not looking for someone under 24. I mean, I'm quite intelligent, have some "bagage" from the past, and usually "younger" guys can't handle that (although there are exceptions, I know that).

Age is therefore not really in issue for me. But i do think people should consider stuff before dating someone a lot older or a lot younger. Needs may differ over age, and especially when the older party gets old when the relationship progresses, particular problems might arise. I think it is important to think about stuff like that, and I sometimes get the feeling that that happens not often enough,

t.a.j. · Member

I would like to, first of all, do away with the delusion that age is just a number. That number accounts for a lot of things. It accounts for your time of birth and the time of your childhood. It determines what events you have witnessed and what options were open to you, when you had to make important decisions. In short: the horizon of your possible experiences is contained within that number, not merely in quantity but in quality as well. Your Life, after all, is a process within the larger process of time passing.

It seems to me that expressions like "It's just a number" are given mostly with the intent to refute the social roles that we associate with people of certain ages: children play, students drink and ****, adults have children and careers, seniors and docile and wise grandparents. And there are some good reasons for rejecting those notions. A fairly straight-forward one is the advanced medical technology, that keeps us active and in good shape for much longer than previously possible, changing the reality of old age for many people. Another is the prevalence of media exposure for children, introducing many aspects into their life-worlds that do not appear in that "traditional" idea of childhood (which isn't very traditional, being something of an invention of 19th century bourgeoisie). But, on the other hand, there is great value in society providing orientation for the individual life, so wanting to totaly doing away with those roles might not be the position one ought to take.

Rather, I would advocate a view of age that celebrates the differences it makes between people. Time is in us as much as we are within time and no matter how hard we try, we cannot escape from our time. In a number of important ways, it makes us who we are. And while the social age roles might be wrong headed and cultural, there is also the biological change, that we undergo as we pass through the years. And as our times enrich us, others are enriched by theirs. Both younger and older people have something to offer you precisely because they differ in age. And for those of us who have partners with - sometimes huge - age differences, don't we in some sense love the other because of her/his age? Because of some perspective he brings on things that we cannot fully share nor comprehend?
And then of course, there are sterotypical images of age and wisdom, age and power, youth and being educated/trained?
Time is in us as much as we are within time and no matter how hard we try, we cannot escape from our time.

Age does make a differences and just because it might not be the one society might have you expect, doesn't mean there isn't any.

There are seven years between me and my kitty and it shows in many ways, it does not contain all we are, but it is a real difference. And I like that it is.

Le Poof · Member

Well age is only a number,
And you can't really choose who you love...
So I've come to think minor laws are silly, but I can understand why they're enforced. (I've never broken them I swear!)
and I've been metally stuck as a 8 year old for as long as can remember. I probably always will be, and I'm very happy I've got my daddy who embraces that fact.

faery · Veteran Member

Uhm, Le Poof, I don't mean to be rude here, but have you even read the post above yours?

w1ntermute · Senior Member

While an age as a number may be just that: a number. Numbers themselves can represent many things. I'll give two examples of how age represents something greater than an arbitrary number.

First example first, okay? Most people have heard the saying "with age comes wisdom". This can be true on several levels. Weather you take wisdom to mean life experience or a more profound change in personality over time as one moves through life. The change shortly after one graduates from high school can be a profound change in lifestyle, personality and experience. This is similar to those people who have gone to college, or working life thereafter.

Example the second: This can be associated closely with the first as in the two may be linked through changes of location or, more importantly, changes in personality and views on life in general between those in a relationship. To discount age while claiming experience can, in rare cases be true; generally it seems like a sophomoric ideal hoisted by those claiming it.

Don't let the whole burden of life get you down, ignore everything here. We all know we have buttloads of life experience and wisdom from it, right?

kimonokitty · Senior Member

I am inclined to agree that age is just a number.

Yes, it can speak for things you may have witnessed (JFK's assination, 9/11, election of Obama), where you were in time (70's, 80's), but what does any of that mean?
Does it shape you as a person? It can, but that doesn't necessarily mean it will or has.

I just don't think assumptions can be made based upon age.
Being a certain age does not mean that you will know/do/think anything in particular.
All it means is that you have been alive for "this" certain amount of time.
It is no indication of how you will behave, how you react to others, the knowledge you have, how responsible you are, or even your maturity.

w1ntermute · Senior Member

I can and DO say that certain instances in history have shaped generations of people. Take parents born in the 50s for example. They all were affected by the 'red scare' hiding under desks from the A-bomb. Silly things like that. The assassination of JFK.

Non public events also shape our awareness as humans, not to mention our opinions on nearly everything. I'd hazard a guess that the more relationship experience a person has, the more acute their opinions on the subject are.

Of course there are instances when younger people can and do have more emotional and or life experience than their older counterparts, but I wouldn't say it paints a completely comparable picture.

I myself am not very old at all, but I can say that the view I had when I was 18, 21, even as recently as 25 are different from the views I have today. I did have a decent amount of 'life experience' how ever one wants to classify that, but it in no way compares to time.

t.a.j. · Member

Basically I would just like to restate what I wrote:
Your age doesn't determine who you are, but it sets the horizon of who you can be.
Both in a global way, as history and the world move on and in a private way, as you change and your life moves on.

kimonokitty · Senior Member

yes, it does. A horizon of who you can be.

but it does so just as much as your ethnicity (culture), where you live/grew up, your religion, or even your education.

w1ntermute · Senior Member

things

KittyBoyMuffin · Veteran Member

RE: Age Difference

t.a.j. · Member

It's not a particularly bad formula.
Maybe morals do turn out to be mathable ;)

NifoKitty · Member

I myself have reached the age of 40, and My Lord is 29. He and I have no problem with the 11 years difference in our ages. But for some strange reason the world does. My mother and brother hate/complain about his and his age. We don't care. But if you look at it this way the social attituted of the world is for the older man and the younger woman, but when a older woman (cougar) is with a younger man they are called cradle robbers, whore, and despoiliers of inocent. WHY? I see nothing wrong with finding a male that can keep up with the sex drive of the older woman.

Besides My Lord acts older than I do by about 30 years.

=^.^=

-- Edited by NifoKitty on Saturday 21st of March 2009 02:03:21 AM

Joli Minou · Senior Member

People are silly. As long as everyone involved is legal and perfectly comfortable with one-another, more power to them!

KittyBoyMuffin · Veteran Member

Yeah ... and anyway, by the formula above, the acceptable age range is 27-66 for you, and 21-44 for him. You're perfectly okay for each other.

kitten130 · Veteran Member

My range is 21-35

tigrenpanthera · Senior Member

well... i finally have something to say on the subject!

age is a number that can represent a few things, yes. the most common one referred to is the level of maturity. but the maturity age and the physical age don't necessarily match--in fact, i've found they seldom do.

i'm 20. if i was told to "act my age" like so many others have been told, i would act a lot more stupid than i actually am, i would make worse decisions, i would give in to peer pressure more than i do. my maturity age is somewhere around 22--still childish at times, but i know when to turn it on and off.

my new master is 32, but he rarely acts it! he acts more 25. so yeah, while we're both outside of the "non-creepy range" set forth by xkcd, we don't ACT it. and we both conset to this as people who are physically over the age of 18, so there really isn't a problem with a 12-year age difference! it is kind of funny to think about it, though--he was driving school buses when i was in elementary school! haha, but he's a very sweet man, and i think we'll both do some good for each other.

Delhome · Veteran Member

Im' 21 this year, and mistress is 18 this year

MastersKitten · Senior Member

Master is close to 5 years older than me. I guess its not really that big of a difference because we're never gotten any grief from it. We are planning our wedding for the beginning of Spring in 2011. At that time, I will be 21 and Master will have just turned 26.

Kitten Morris · Veteran Member

Age bothers me, I don't know why, but it always has. The sight of older women dating younger men makes me sick. I would never date someone younger for me because of this and also for maturity reasons. Now, I could somewhat understand if the male was the pet and younger, but if he's younger and a master or vanilla... just eww. Master is almost two years older than me, but that is the absolute youngest I will go. He looks a bit older than his age though and he's really tall (6'4) so that helps :3

Edit: Typed younger instead of older... oops (he's 19, I'm 17 going on 18 next month)

-- Edited by Kitten Morris on Saturday 11th of July 2009 08:54:55 PM

LilithPride · Senior Member

Age means nothing to me, but maturity has bit me before, I'm immature and finding those like me can sometimes lead to drama. My current masters are actually just about my age, and My female one is my height and my shoesize!!!!! (we even have matching breasts =p) Age is something I arbitrarily look at, but the appearance speaks for more than that. I saw the movie Harold and Maude as a kid which blasts in the face of Ageists love story of a 17 year old and a 60 something year old. They had such a sweet and innocent love. That movie is cute and makes a good statement.

Tsubi_ · Veteran Member

I am 18 my master is 26
It feels nice to be dominated by an older (not too old) male
I feel secured and warm ^-^
and because I'm young, he said I am a cute little highschool girl

mm uniforms~~

TorbjornS · Veteran Member

5 yers beten mi and my girl.
6 yers betwhen my perents

-- Edited by TorbjornS on Saturday 18th of July 2009 07:54:23 AM

Tsubi_ · Veteran Member

TorbjornS wrote:

5 yers beten mi and my girl.
6 yers betwhen my perents

-- Edited by TorbjornS on Saturday 18th of July 2009 07:54:23 AM

ooh is she younger or older? ^^

kimonokitty · Senior Member

lol, kitten morris, do you feel the same about a guy dating a younger woman?

Also, you might want to edit your post again. There's some very incriminating evidence in it.